![[personal profile]](https://www.dreamwidth.org/img/silk/identity/user.png){kind=small}
preserved_ginger) wrote2008-02-10 03:30 am
I Am
Character(s): Rose, Ten. Very brief mentions of Jackie, alt!Pete and Mickey.
Pairing(s): Ten/Rose
Rating: PG
Beta: The fantastic
![[livejournal.com profile]](https://www.dreamwidth.org/img/external/lj-userinfo.gif){kind=small}
karenorDisclaimer: Borrowed, sans permission.
Spoilers: Set during Doomsday.
A/N: This fic takes place in the You're Not? universe, and is Rose's take on the events of that story. All italicised dialogue is from the episode.
Summary: He'd pick up on the falsehood straight away.
"I told mum and dad and Mickey. Anyone else would think I was mad. But not those three."
When the Doctor had begun whispering in her mind, she'd told them, her mother and Mickey and Pete. She'd taken a chance that they'd believe her and help her, and they had. She'd thought he was coming to bring her home, and she'd never been more relieved in her life - how was she supposed to tell her mother she was pregnant by someone she'd never see again? But then had come the events on that god-forsaken Norwegian beach, which had gone some way towards breaking her.
"You're not?"
He’d asked her what she’d known he'd ask her, when she'd mentioned the baby, and she couldn't tell him the truth. She’d known she couldn’t, although it went against everything she was, everything they’d been, to lie to him. How could I have given him news that should bring such joy, when all it could achieve would be to bring him more pain? But how could she not tell him? He'd pick up on the falsehood straight away. He knew her too well these days not to.
"No. It's mum."
She’d fudged it, in the end, telling him it was her mother who was pregnant; she’d not managed to fool him before, though, and she was almost certain she’d not managed it now. The way he was looking at me, as if he knew that I'd lied to him but wasn't going to call me on it. There was nothing he could do about it anyway. But there were other things to say to each other, and there would never be the chance to go back to that part of the conversation and pick up that thread again, never any time for her to reconsider the decision that she'd regretted in the same instant she'd made it.
"Am I ever gonna see you again?"
"You can't."
She was never going to see him again, and he didn’t know, didn't have that extra impetus to find her, them, again that the knowledge would bring. She was canny enough to know that the idea of his not being the last of his kind any more would encourage him to do whatever was necessary to overcome the "impossible". She'd felt him on the other side of that wall that day, which was supposedly "impossible", after all.
"Oh, I've got the TARDIS. Same old life. Last of the Time Lords."
She felt as if she'd betrayed him, the man she loved so fiercely, and she'd never meant to. Never wanted to lie to him. All she'd ever wanted to do was to save him from more pain.
So why did she feel so guilty?
no subject
no subject
I feel so bad for both of them.
That's what I was aiming for, so 'm glad it's worked!
no subject
Great job as always!
no subject
I am glad you like it; I'm always self-conscious when it comes to writing Rose as I'm not confident that I have her "voice" right.
no subject
I agree. I watched it, too, and I couldn't help but agree that the look on his face suggests different knowledge entirely.
You captured this perfectly!
no subject
I watched it, too, and I couldn't help but agree that the look on his face suggests different knowledge entirely.
He so doesn't believe her, does he?
no subject
no subject
Extremely powerful. Very well done.
Thank you!
no subject
no subject
Thank you! (I love your icon, by the way)
no subject
no subject
maybe, in his martyr-like psyche, he figured that it would be better for her to live out her life safely, without him. Maybe not even consciously, but the notion was strong enough to keep him from going that extra step to try.
That's probably what he is thinking, but it's making him thoroughly unhappy in the process, isn't it?
But a time baby? There's no way that she'd be better off raising a time baby without him!
Exactly (which is why, at some point, we will see Alice's father coming back; not quite sure how, yet.
no subject
no subject
I suspected he didn't believe her, but you've expressed it here in a way that makes it canon for me.
I don't know if it's how DT played it, or whether it was just my wishful thinking, but like you I had the distinct vibe that he didn't believe a word she had to say on this particular subject.
One wonders whether Rose has tried to protect him by withholding information before, which is why he's suspicious?
no subject
no subject
I imagine she'd do pretty much anything to protect him, bless her
Yep, I'd agree with you there.
no subject
Thank you for continuing the series.
no subject
Thank you for continuing the series.
There will be more before we're done with this 'verse, I can promise you :)
no subject
no subject
Thank you!
no subject
no subject
I've had the distinct vibe, since Parting of the Ways if not earlier, that Rose will do just about anything to keep the Doctor from experiencing more pain.